A shade of grey, a balanced blend

24 Sep

There are the first signs of a smile beginning to form as I contemplated penning down my thoughts.

At first I thought it would be easy to write about a tomboy because all my life I have believed myself to be tomboyish, if not necessarily a tomboy. I still do. (Psst… I love being the rebel, the exception, the misfit and the non-conformist) I gave it a sincere thought, putting aside the image I like to portray of myself. Am I a tomboy? Am I an extreme? I realized I wasn’t.

I asked the husband, “Do you think I am a tomboy?”

“Who you? No. I think not.” That reply came in a tone which a husband would have used when a wife would have asked “Am I fat?”

It was like taking a safe zone, unsure of what you reply would ensue. So I prodded him a little more and asked him for his definitions.

“Tomboys are girls who wear guy clothes, sneakers, talk like men do, play sports and fight physically, don’t wear make-up”

“That is still more than 50% if you give me a score, with the sports and physical fights being an exception. Now, my BFF plays cricket, follows almost every sport, and does prefer shoes over sandals, but I still wouldn’t call her a tomboy. I prefer shoes too, dressed like a guy till I started working in a company which MAKES me follow a dress code, have plenty of guys as friends as compared to a handful of girls. In fact, my guy friends always forget there is a girl in the group when they talk about certain things that would be considered rude in female company. And neither do I wear make-up. Does that not make me a tomboy?”


“Hmm…then what in your opinion is a girly girl?” I ask, sneering a little. Strangely my prejudiced mind equates them to bimbos.

“A girl who likes to dress up, wears make up, paints her nails, cares about her hair, prefers skirts/ frocks over pants/shorts, heels over sports shoes, likes gossiping…. I don’t know. Where is this going anyways?”

“Atleast that means I am not girly”, I say, somewhat relieved.

“Well, you can dress up when you want to and play the part of a girl well enough” he said smiling.

“You are a strong headed girl with shades of both tom-boyishness and girlishness. You are willful. You take up the role that the time and situation requires you to. A balanced blend of both.”


So, not satisfied, I asked people. A lot of them, their definitions of a tomboy and a girly girl. You see, the definitions are relative and perspective based and keep changing with the era.

Everyone I asked answered on the same lines as my husband, all 3 questions.

Maybe, in the past, as a kid, I would have hated it if somebody would have called me girly. For a girl who still speaks in the masculine gender, it sounds like an accusation. The older and wiser me knows better. Shuffling between roles and holding my ground, that’s my definition.

I am a shade of grey. And I am proud of it.

What shade are you?


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

Reema's Garden

Gardening Simplified!!

Chick Lit Hall of Fame

Single women narratives. Diversity. Feminism

The Blog of Author Tim Ferriss

Tim Ferriss's 4-Hour Workweek and Lifestyle Design Blog

A World Full of Scribbles

live to travel, travel to live, love the unknown

Morning Story and Dilbert

Inspiring, Encouraging, Healthy / Why waste the best stories of the World, pour a cup of your favorite beverage and let your worries drift away…

Cooking Without Limits

Food Photography & Recipes


Where Creativity and Imagination Creates Wonderful Ideas for Your Home!


Politics, things that make you think, and recreational breaks

the 3 R's blog

30 Projects x 30 Weeks x 3 Principles

Mad Over Marketing

We applaud the best, and make fun of the rest.

The Life and Times of an Indian Homemaker

My life and everything that touches it....

Amit Sharma

Welcome to the website

%d bloggers like this: